Monday, May 7, 2007

No progress this weekend

On my way to the test photo shoot, I got a call from the photographer saying that her sister was bent over in pain and she had to rush her to the hospital. So that didn't happen. When I got home, Todd and I took a break to relax and watcth "Blood Diamonds" which made me real sad but it is a great movie and everyone should watch it. I am feeling pretty guilty about my little diamonds at the moment but I am glad that I opted for a blue sapphire which comes from Australia were there are no warloads killing people and chopping their arms off (not that I am aware of). I am seriously considering going with an estate or reclaimed gold wedding band now because although I am not Condolezza and I can't make a big different I like to make a statements in my own little world.
But I digress, somehow on Saturday night I brought up the fact that I would prefer a townhouse or a condo in Hudson county because I feel that I am too young to do the house in the suburbs with a lawn thing. This lead to a 3 hour discussion and we failed to make it to the store to do this Registry thing. I wonder if it is normal for engaged couples to argue about silly hypothetical situations? Maybe we need more counseling? And of course, it's not like it changed anything because we are still not going to purchase a condo in Dowtown Jersey City...we can't afford it! Moral of the story: I should pick the right time to bring up contraversial things because nothing gets done!

8 comments:

chinleti said...

Hey girl! Sorry that you were not able to make any progress this weekend but don't worry i know that you will this week and in weeks to come. Just to let you know that disagreements are common as you guys will be going through a new phase in life which takes much adjustment. And this adjustment is going to continue well into the marriage years. Continue to communicate. And if you think that a topic may be controversial, either get it all out up front or talk about it after you guys have done what you have to do. Remember that time is of the essence. Much has to be done. If you need any help, i am there for you. I will be praying for you guys as always.

LadyEboDiva said...

WTF!!! Okay first Gold bands are played...hehhehehee!!!
But I know you may think yoa''need counseling but really you guys will never see eye to eye on everything. If you did that means someone is lying and teh other person is just letting the other do what ever they want. You guys are talking about the things you want and think about it he isn't ganna want what you want b/c he isn't you. You may feel that you dont want this house now, but maybe he's thinking about wanting that house cause you may need it in the future.
Ya'll are just gonna have to keep talking cause communicating is the key to knowing what's up in yall relationship
Luv ya girl

ChingDiva said...

I think all couples argue over silly hypothetical situations. I took an informal poll around the office, and 9 out of the 10 people I asked say they do it all the time. (Email, lol, you know we don't have anything to do at work!)

It may make you question your relationship, but I think you and Todd will be fine.

Question: How much counseling do you guys get?

You can always register tomorrow! Or this weekend or whatever.

vlagrl said...

HA!! Blood Diamond is first on my netflix queue. After I watch it I will let you know what I think about gold bands.

I'm SO sorry I showed you some of the places in my area that are low in your price range for condo/coops!!! It was the trigger that set you off!

It is totally normal that you are having disagreements. This time is difficult for couples with the stress of the wedding and now you have compounded it with the stress of buying a home. Also, Todd has been in charge of finding a home for you. You can't blame him for having an adverse reaction to you not being 100% on board with the homes he has been finding. You've got a good man that is looking for a home for his new wife and one day kiddies...don't cringe! It's just one disagreement. It doesn't mean you need counseling. Its great you expressed how you feel, now he knows and you guys can keep on trucking. Stay positive!!! I'm hear if you need to vent anytime over some yummy eats. xoxo!!!

chinleti said...

I have this book that you should read. It's called the Don't Sweat Guide for Couples and they also have a Don't Sweat Guide for Newlyweds. The author is Richard Carlson, Ph. D. It is excellent! Start with the one for couples first.
O, and I saw Blood Diamond. It really makes you not want to buy a diamond after all the killing that goes on over in Africa because of it.

Unknown said...

What are you going to fight over next the baby's middle name. Let's wait to get through the wedding plans before you start bickering about long term living arrangements.

First consider yourselves blessed that you currently have nice digs to live in. That you will not be moving into his momma's basement after the wedding. And that you actually have the means to be discussing buying something in this overheated market in the Northeast.

Count your blessings and then discuss finding ways to "enlarge your territory". !

PS: Love the idea of a black and white wedding !!!

Unknown said...

Count your blessings, your are arguing about a house and not whos parents you will be living with until!!!!!! Arguments are healthty so long as it does not get out of hand and it is about something important (a lot of people have senseless arguments). Remember you are 2 different people (may born under the same sign but you have your differences) and will have different taste in some things, variety add spice to life.

NJDiva said...

Thanks for the advise, you ladies are funny what would I do with you (smile). BTW, my mom has a very nice basement should we ever need one to live in ;-)